This morning, my friend Vicki asked me, "Aren't blogs supposed to be about 'your' experience? What you feel about stuff, what you are learning about yourself? Isn't that the point of the walkabout?" She had just read my blog, and, from it, she seemed to think I was missing the point of this walkabout, focusing on the exterior to the exclusion of my interior. To her thinking, this blog, Wandering Reflections, had become solely about the "Wandering" instead of the "Reflections". I pondered my responses to Vicki's questions throughout the drive from Memphis to Jackson.
She was right. I've been falling into old patterns, focused on showing you all what I was seeing and doing, and not thinking. I shouldn't be surprised that she was right, she almost always is.
Her questions led to me thinking more about friendship. There's that old joke that a good friend will help you move, but a great friend will help you move bodies. While I was driving, I realized that a good friend will love and accept you for the person that you are, but a great friend will see the best version of you that could be and push you to make that version.
I've been blessed with a lot of great friends in my life. Other than family members, Vicki was probably the first "great" friend I've had. She never shies away from pushing me to be better. She's been doing it since we were in the seventh grade together. She should be congratulated on her patience with me, and her persistence. She's already well on her way to being the best version of herself, which has always made my job trying to be a great friend to her very easy.
Like Vicki, Bart and Paulina have been great friends to me. I'll never forget how, shortly after I started working with Bart, he was reviewing the draft of a motion I had written. Afterwards, we sat down in his office, and he gave me the bald truth, that it was not a very good draft. Bart rightly tore the draft apart, and had many valid critiques of my work. But, as we were finishing our discussion, he looked me right in the eye and said that he knew I could do a better job, that I was intelligent and a great writer. He said that he believed in me. I don't know if he ever knew how much that meant to me to hear, but it definitely pushed me to be better. I can only hope that I live up to his belief in me.
With Paulina, she's been there to offer advice and a well-deserved (proverbial) smack up the side of my head when she thought I was being stupid or stubborn. She pushed me to go outside my narrow comfort zone, and be open to new things and new experiences. Sometimes she was successful, sometimes she was not. But she always pushed, and that was and is appreciated.
My list of great friends could definitely continue, but while I was driving, these three examples of came quickly to mind. If it sometimes seems like my friends have to use a bulldozer to push me to be the best version of myself, I believe that has more to do with my stubbornness and intractability than anything else. Please know that I appreciate your ongoing efforts on my behalf, even if I seem sometimes like I don't. Thanks for never giving up on me.
Anyway, I wanted to share these thoughts with all of you, and I'd love to hear your thoughts on the matter. Going forward, I try to remember that this blog is about Wandering Reflections, and not just wandering. Thankfully, I know I can count on Vicki and others to remind me if I forget.
Happy St. Patrick's Day everyone!
No comments:
Post a Comment